We are in the midst of an extensive purge of stuff. The goal is to fit all our belongings either in a couple pieces of luggage each or in a ten by ten storage unit. It is an interesting project. And sometimes exhausting. Everyday I am snapping pics of furniture to post on craigslist and sending texts to my big kids asking if they want this book or these dishes, does anyone want my nightstands or a sewing machine or the kitchen table. Everyday we pack more boxes and sort through more clothing. We have organized piles of boxes around the house. This stack goes to grown kids. This stack goes into storage. That stack is to donate. That stack is to sell. And then there is the undecided stack. That's the tough one, all the stuff that will require further thought. And work.
There can be something truly liberating about letting go of things though. For reals. First there is the guilt complex that some of my stuff just radiates! Books I should have read. Projects I should have done. But as soon as I remove that book or that fabric or whatever it is from my house, that pressure to do the task that that thing was constantly reminding me I hadn't yet done is just gone. And it feels pretty good. I am no longer a bad mother whose younger children cannot remember ever having been camping with the family, I am just someone who owns no camping gear. A quilt I started to make more than 20 years ago which I have secretly hated almost from the beginning, but which I have felt all along that I 'should' finish it? Well it is gone. So there, I can't finish it.
Then there is just the responsibility and time involved in owning and organizing stuff. We went through all our games last weekend. We cleared out the cabinet in the dining room that housed all the little card games and travel sized games and chess pieces and dice (YES! we had a tub full of dice), as well as the big closet that had all the bigger board games. Now they are all in boxes to store or in a pile to give away and suddenly I don't need to spend another minute organizing the game closet for the millionth time, gathering up and properly distributing all the various game pieces that have mysteriously escaped their assigned box and are roaming freely on the shelves. It is almost as though I have gained hours of free time that used to be dedicated to putting things away or fixing things or finding things. Now I have some guilt free time to actually play the few games we kept out to use now.
Of course some things are harder than others to discard or even to put out of sight. Some of my books were hard... what if I suddenly need to look something up in that particular history book? What if I decide to re read all the Harry Potter books right now? What if I just like seeing my pretty books on the shelves? Or my cute little elephant collection for that matter? But its ok, I put those things in a box, I labeled the boxes, we will put them all in storage and I will see them again sometime.
Monday, February 27, 2017
Sunday, February 12, 2017
Road tripping
We recently arrived home from 3 weeks on the road. Three weeks in 2 vehicles with 10 people, 20ish pieces of luggage, 6 laptops, probably at least 2 dozen books and 10 lbs of rice. Yes rice. It actually didn't travel the whole way with us but was rashly purchased mid trip because I really wanted meatballs and rice for dinner and was at Costco, where, let's face it, I was probably lucky to get such a small bag. I couldn't abandon the uncooked rice. So, it traveled the rest of the way with us and has now happily joined the rice storage at home.
We have a decent history of road tripping. Sometimes the trip is about visiting people. Sometimes it is about an event. Sometimes it is just a cool place to see. And always we try to see some cool things along the way. Traveling to Florida we stopped to see New Orleans and have beignets at Cafe du Monde in the French quarter. On our way to Pennsylvania we visited the St Louis Arch. Visiting family in Arizona, we took an afternoon at the Grand Canyon. Frequently we have traveled with more than one toddler. More often lately with more than one teenager. We have even traveled with teenagers and toddlers at once. We have camped in tents en route (I really do not recommend this), we have stayed in cabins and hotels, and most recently we prefer to rent houses.
So here is how this particular trip went down though. Bright and early, only two days after Christmas my alarm went off at some cursed hour. I drug myself from my nice, warm bed and grudgingly showered and dressed in the clothes I had carefully put out the night before. Laying my clothes out is not a daily habit, (unless you count dropping my clothes on the floor next to the bed at night and donning the same thing the next morning) it is a traveling thing. Especially a 'we're leaving early in the morning before I am fully conscious' thing. We loaded the cars with all the luggage that was waiting in a stack in the living room. The general rule is each person gets one duffel bag and one backpack. The duffel is tucked away in the back, the backpack rides with you and that is where all those books were stashed away and where everyone carried their precious bag of snacks and where those of us who are artistically inclined have their sketchbooks and where at least a couple people had crammed pillows. We actually were out of here at almost precisely 6 am. Which was good cause we had 12 hours of driving ahead of us that day.
2 cars following each other is not really my ideal road tripping scenario. You lose one another. One car goes too fast. One car goes too slow. One car looks exactly like several other cars on the road and you don't realize until you have exited the freeway and entered a Costco parking lot that you are following the wrong vehicle and have been for who knows how long. But we reached our destination somewhere close to those 12 hours later. Ideally, I wouldn't drive that far in one day. No one is happy by the time it is over. But in this case we wanted to stay with relatives and that was how far away they were. Also; Cell phones, GPS and adult children who can take a turn driving are a huge advancement in road tripping conveniences.
We spent our first couple of days with family. Because when you plan a trip that takes you right by your sister's house or your in-laws' house, well its nice to stop. And its fun. And they feed you and let you sleep on their couch for free, even when there's 10 of you (we used more than one couch... and maybe the floor and some air mattresses too). After a visit in Phoenix (where a couple of my kids took that dare to jump into an unheated pool in December---brrrr) we moved on to an apartment on a beach south of San Diego. We spent a week walking on the beach and pier, building 'pompeii' in the sand, playing catch on the beach and cards in the apartment, sighting dolphins and seals in the water and looking in vain for the orca that supposedly inhabited the area. Oh... and passing around a nasty stomach virus and getting rained on. Then we 'moved' again and spent a week in a house near Anaheim. Two more flew in to join us. Our house here was huge with lots of bedrooms and even lemon trees in the yard. So we made lemonade. And went to Disneyland. And got rained on some more. Disneyland is still pretty fun, even when it rains. Except sometimes when your boat comes out of the Its a Small World tunnel and you realize it is raining *again* and they won't let you out of your stupid little boat quite yet and you sort of want to cry for just a minute or two. But most of the time, it is still fun. Just more wet. And way less crowded.
Then we came home. I can recall in the past arriving home from vacations and feeling like I could finally rest after all that vacationing! Coming home was a relief. But not so this time. Not really. I arrived home feeling a tad burdened by all the stuff I left behind that apparently I got along without just fine for those 3 weeks. I traveled with enough clothes for a week. And never wore half of it. And yet at home I had even more in my closet. It was so easy to pack up suitcases at the beach apartment, be at a new rental house that afternoon, and commence 'living' there. One trip to a grocery store and we were set for a new week in a new home. And it was fun. And I could have done it again the next week and the next and I am not at all sure that I would tire of it.
We have a decent history of road tripping. Sometimes the trip is about visiting people. Sometimes it is about an event. Sometimes it is just a cool place to see. And always we try to see some cool things along the way. Traveling to Florida we stopped to see New Orleans and have beignets at Cafe du Monde in the French quarter. On our way to Pennsylvania we visited the St Louis Arch. Visiting family in Arizona, we took an afternoon at the Grand Canyon. Frequently we have traveled with more than one toddler. More often lately with more than one teenager. We have even traveled with teenagers and toddlers at once. We have camped in tents en route (I really do not recommend this), we have stayed in cabins and hotels, and most recently we prefer to rent houses.
So here is how this particular trip went down though. Bright and early, only two days after Christmas my alarm went off at some cursed hour. I drug myself from my nice, warm bed and grudgingly showered and dressed in the clothes I had carefully put out the night before. Laying my clothes out is not a daily habit, (unless you count dropping my clothes on the floor next to the bed at night and donning the same thing the next morning) it is a traveling thing. Especially a 'we're leaving early in the morning before I am fully conscious' thing. We loaded the cars with all the luggage that was waiting in a stack in the living room. The general rule is each person gets one duffel bag and one backpack. The duffel is tucked away in the back, the backpack rides with you and that is where all those books were stashed away and where everyone carried their precious bag of snacks and where those of us who are artistically inclined have their sketchbooks and where at least a couple people had crammed pillows. We actually were out of here at almost precisely 6 am. Which was good cause we had 12 hours of driving ahead of us that day.
2 cars following each other is not really my ideal road tripping scenario. You lose one another. One car goes too fast. One car goes too slow. One car looks exactly like several other cars on the road and you don't realize until you have exited the freeway and entered a Costco parking lot that you are following the wrong vehicle and have been for who knows how long. But we reached our destination somewhere close to those 12 hours later. Ideally, I wouldn't drive that far in one day. No one is happy by the time it is over. But in this case we wanted to stay with relatives and that was how far away they were. Also; Cell phones, GPS and adult children who can take a turn driving are a huge advancement in road tripping conveniences.
We spent our first couple of days with family. Because when you plan a trip that takes you right by your sister's house or your in-laws' house, well its nice to stop. And its fun. And they feed you and let you sleep on their couch for free, even when there's 10 of you (we used more than one couch... and maybe the floor and some air mattresses too). After a visit in Phoenix (where a couple of my kids took that dare to jump into an unheated pool in December---brrrr) we moved on to an apartment on a beach south of San Diego. We spent a week walking on the beach and pier, building 'pompeii' in the sand, playing catch on the beach and cards in the apartment, sighting dolphins and seals in the water and looking in vain for the orca that supposedly inhabited the area. Oh... and passing around a nasty stomach virus and getting rained on. Then we 'moved' again and spent a week in a house near Anaheim. Two more flew in to join us. Our house here was huge with lots of bedrooms and even lemon trees in the yard. So we made lemonade. And went to Disneyland. And got rained on some more. Disneyland is still pretty fun, even when it rains. Except sometimes when your boat comes out of the Its a Small World tunnel and you realize it is raining *again* and they won't let you out of your stupid little boat quite yet and you sort of want to cry for just a minute or two. But most of the time, it is still fun. Just more wet. And way less crowded.
Then we came home. I can recall in the past arriving home from vacations and feeling like I could finally rest after all that vacationing! Coming home was a relief. But not so this time. Not really. I arrived home feeling a tad burdened by all the stuff I left behind that apparently I got along without just fine for those 3 weeks. I traveled with enough clothes for a week. And never wore half of it. And yet at home I had even more in my closet. It was so easy to pack up suitcases at the beach apartment, be at a new rental house that afternoon, and commence 'living' there. One trip to a grocery store and we were set for a new week in a new home. And it was fun. And I could have done it again the next week and the next and I am not at all sure that I would tire of it.
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